Straight Guy MBA Drag Queens
Published: Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Updated: Tuesday, May 10, 2011 12:05
Moustaches met marabou last Thursday night when six straight Stern guys hit the stage at Bar-Tini. They hit it hard too since they aren't so graceful in heels yet!
450 Sternies and friends attended the beyond-sold-out "School's Out, So Are We" end of the year party, organized by incoming OutClass President Jonathan Kiman, Outgoing Seniors Brian Choi and Jenny Ngu, and moi, Linz Shelton. The venue was kind enough to release 100 additional tickets after OutClass sold out in the first hour of the Cinco-de-Gayo Beer Blast. Partnered with MCA, GFA, and GMA, and with the help of a short Youtube video going viral in the weeks leading up to May 5, anticipation around the event was already at a high before the OutClass Flashmob even hit the floor.
"Tamara Morning" (known around Stern as Zach Goldman) arrived on the shoulders of a harem of shirtless men. We've got to hand it to Tamara for that one: she clearly has great taste in guys. She was joined by "Amber Alert" (Paul Marcato), who looked devilishly fetching in her "devil with a blue-dress on"-ensemble, "Helena Handbasket" (Scott Yocum) a feisty firecracker in a rainbow lame mini-dress, Bolly Wood (Vivek Bhatt), who made no apologies for her midriff-baring sari, "Tequila Mockingbird" (Nate Pinkston), sporting a sultry flamenco look, and "Miss B. Hayven" (Brendan Murnane) who's rocker-chic getup would have made Joan Jett proud.
Lola Bakare, MC extraordinaire, guided the queens through a hilarious series of competitive drag events: 1) chug a beer without ruining your lipstick, 2) do as many pushups as you can without losing your high heals, 3) lip-synch for your life!
While Tamara took home the title and coveted iPad thanks in no small part to her now-legendary Spice Girls performance (that girl's "bend and snap" put's Elle Woods' to shame!), OutClass would like to honor the runners-up and award them each with their own titles:
Miss Congeniality goes to both "Amber Alert" and "Helena Handbasket" – who overcame a DJ-disaster when the songs for which they'd prepared lip-sync routines were scrambled. "Amber" was ready to perform Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive" and "Helena" was ready to give us a rockin' rendition of Aerosmith's "Dude Looks Like a Lady." Like the true queens that they are, each improvised and gave us FIERCE on the fly performances.
Miss National Costume goes to "Bolly Wood" – with or without the bean bag boobs she looked amazing. Miss Photogenic goes to "Tequila Mockingbird" whose fluttering epic-length eyelashes behind her feathered fan gave the Stern paparazzi some great material ("Like" the School's Out, So Are We Facebook Page to see photos.) And Miss … well Miss'ing In Action goes to "Miss B. Hayven" who tapped out in the first round but redeemed herself later in the evening in a tights-only off-stage dance performance (those photos probably won't make it into Facebook.)
OutClass thanks of MCA, GFA, GMA, Mistress of Ceremonies Lola Bakare, Comedienne Bianca Del Rio, Fairy Drag Mother Austin Riggs, all the queens, their Stern stylists, the shirtless entourage, and everyone who came out (pun intended) to make this a gay old time for all.