Where They Are Now

Terry Ryan retired undefeated from the UFC after crushing Chuck "The Iceman" Liddell, and now teaches business ethics at an Upper East Side elementary school.

RJ Panda won a Nobel Prize, just for being cute. It got revoked when he got arrested for running a toxic waste dumping operation in a New Jersey riverbed. He's out on parole and refuses to change his light bulbs to the energy saving ones, out of spite.

Ori Gratch and Tim Hobbs won an Oscar but Ori wasn't there to accept; he lives in exile in France because of an alleged relationship with his movie's underage starlet, which has yet to be proven.

Greg Urban was hired by Blackstone to organize Stephen Schwartzman's birthday parties. Now everyone brings their own beer and BX stock finally rebounded.

Brian Jones was convicted of losing $60 billion by using his company's funds to short Google and Berkshire Hathaway under the advice of every Stern finance professor.

J (Alvaro) Haces got an honorary PhD from NYU Medical School for his extensive knowledge of STD's, and now practices gynecology without a license.

Jocelyn Splitter married Patrick Dempsey and now makes a killer apple pie.

Serena Tong got really fat after eating all that pizza and ice cream, and then lost all the weight with a monotonous Subway diet (and the Ab-Flex that Sally Struthers recommends).

Lorne Lucree shocked all the girlfriends he's seen in their underwear by finally admitting he's actually straight.

Robb Henzi donated his brain to science, and then went on to be a successful politician. He organizes happy hours every Thursday on Capitol Hill.

Makoto Miyauchi became the recipient of the first artificial liver and the spokesman for Ambien in Japan.

Payal Dalal runs a high class escort service and sells the information of her clients to all the gossip magazines.

Casper Munch became a Hollywood consultant and now advises actresses on their fake orgasm scenes full-time.

Michael Pesce, after a freak accident with a radioactive grasshopper, patrols the streets of Manhattan at night in green tights.

Joao Auler lost in the final round of the Brazilian presidential elections after some old Japanese TV stock footage resurfaced.

Eduardo Sera became the new signature laugh for the Pillsbury doughboy's incursion into Latin America.

E.R. Silverbush runs an all girl undergrad dormitory in the East Village to compete directly with Palladium. He is happy living on the top floor penthouse and cultivates his own "tea."

Atul Gupta married Ruchi Gupta and their family is now known as the Gupta-Guptas.

Sachin Khattar saved the world through his music. He is now doing your mom.

Brian Newman, after being mistaken as a Mexican illegal alien because of his Spanish language skills and Latino looks, was deported and now operates a bar on the beach in Zihuatanejo, Mexico.

Louis Kay made a fortune on the stock market and then lost it all on whores and booze and gambling. He now lives in a van down by the river with every other GFA officer.

George Pushchinsky opened the first rehab-center/ski-resort in the world. All the lifts are polarized glass gondolas and take, like, forever to get to the top, dude.

Olga Nekrasova, Neely Pielet, and Margaret Park had a sleepover and a pillow fight. They were all wearing sexy pajamas.

Kathleen Berroth got a job in China. Kathleen Berroth also got a job in Japan. Kathleen Berroth also got a job in Korea.

Daniel Parker asked Al Qaeda where they were hiding Osama Bin Laden so many times, that they surrendered him to the Americans.

Michael Buse won the New York lottery, twice. But the money was cursed.

Noreen Haider changed her name to DJ Loco Haider project. You can find her CD playing loudly in every A/X and Abercrombie & Fitch store in the world.

Jeremy Johnson became a televangelist, got bored, grew out his hair and beard, invented his own religion, and now enjoys a steady stream of donations from his loyal herd. He still likes to party.

Daria Burke challenged Terry Ryan to one last match, and beat the crap out of him. She now holds the UFC championship belt, painted it pink, and covered it with glitter and rhinestones.

Esteban Riojas put you in his limited profile on Facebook, so you never find out what he actually becomes.